Clinical Hypnotherapy & NLP Coaching
in Cheshire & Staffordshire
Low Self Esteem – How To Improve It
How many times have you stopped yourself from going after a dream, or speaking up when you knew the answer, or expressing yourself when you had the urge? It’s not that you can’t. You know you are capable. But something is
stopping you… makes you want to hide and not be noticed…
Something inside you: low self-esteem.
Self-Confidence and Self-Esteem
There’s a difference between self-confidence and
Self-confidence is belief in your ability. Self-esteem is
belief in your worthiness. Both can stop you from achieving,
expressing, or even enjoying life. Of the two, self-esteem is
more difficult to improve. Skills and knowledge can be
acquired and you can build up your self-confidence with
every small achievement or milestone.
If you don’t feel worthy of success – or recognition, praise, prosperity or love… your life will be less than it can be.
The only way to raise your self-esteem is to change the way you think about yourself. With Positive Minds Hypnotherapy we teach you to recognize your self-talk. Your first step is to enter the alpha brainwave state. While in alpha, listen to your inner speech. Become aware of the way you talk about yourself, both to yourself and to others. If your self-esteem is low, you will be shocked at how badly you speak about yourself. “I can’t”… All those little self-deprecating remarks, all the subtle put-downs of yourself – and all of the times you say “no” when someone tries to give you something – are holding you back from living the life you desire.
One of the central themes taught by Positive Minds Hypnotherapy is positive thinking. To raise your self-esteem, you must start thinking that you are worthy of having what you desire. You must start thinking about yourself as you think about your best friend.
How to Raise Your Self-Esteem Using Affirmations
Whatever it is you feel you don’t deserve, you have to derail that negative train of thought. Affirmations are self-programming based on repetition until the desirable intention is implanted in the mind.
Affirmations are not idle chit-chat. They are commands. First, say them while in the receptive alpha brainwave state. Second, make them in the present tense: “I am…” or “I have…” etc. Third, repeat them consistently until you no longer feel the urge to continue. Usually it takes about 30-60 days for an idea to become implanted in your mind. Don’t give up. Eventually they’ll sink in. And fourth, say them with belief that “it is so.”
How to Raise Your Self-Esteem By Saying “Thank You”
Increasing your self-esteem includes learning to receive.
It’s been ingrained in many of us that “it’s better to give
han to receive.” While that’s a noble concept, people
with low self-esteem take it to the extreme. In your mind
you already believe that only other people are worthy of
receiving, so you make it a habit to say “no”. Can you see
how damaging this is? To become worthy in your own mind,
you must act the part of the worthy receiver, by graciously
accepting what is given.
Still don’t want to receive? Does it feel awkward and somehow shameful? Use another Positive Minds technique – visualization. Put yourself mentally in the shoes of the giver. What if someone rejects what you want to give them? How does that make you feel? Pretty awful, right? Now step back in your own shoes. Be the receiver. Graciously accept what the person gives you, and make that person’s day!
Next time someone gives you a compliment… don’t shrug it off by saying, “oh, it was nothing, (followed by some self-deprecating remark)”. That’s a rejection of the loving gift of a compliment! Instead, say, “Thank you.” Obviously the person giving the compliment feels you deserve it. Why don’t you? Accept it graciously. Learn that it’s okay and normal to be complimented. Give compliments often, so you see how good it feels to give and receive them.
Compliments are like affirmations of your worth, except they come from other people!
The next time someone wants to give you money for your services or products, don’t under-price yourself. You can do favours for people and help out when you can – but there is also generosity in receiving. Accept graciously. The person paying you believes that your service or product deserves compensation. Why don’t you? If you feel your service or product is less than your best, then improve it. Always do your best. But if you’re giving your best, you must learn that it’s okay and normal to be fairly compensated. Encourage others to accept fair compensation, so that you see how good it feels to give and receive money.
Fair compensation is like an affirmation of your worth, except it comes from other people!
Try this technique with anything you feel you’re not worthy of having. Anything. Including the big one, LOVE. Put yourself in the shoes of the giver. Whatever it is someone wants to give you, always remember that they feel you deserve it. Learn to agree with them… and give what you wish to receive.
By receiving, you are also giving: you are giving the giver the feeling of happiness that comes from giving. Don’t deprive people of giving, just because YOU are the receiver! You ARE worthy of receiving! Keep the energy circulating. Give them the joy of giving by being grateful.
Through learning self-hypnosis with Positive Minds you can help raise your self-esteem indirectly through the program’s many mind exercises, by teaching you mental mastery. You can’t always control situations and you can’t control other people. You can only control yourself. When you control yourself, you have the strength to NOT give in to undesirable behaviours that undermine your self-esteem; to say “OK” and go DO something even when you’re shaking in fear; to not care what other people think when you want to express yourself.
The more you reprogram your “anti-you” negative self-talk, the faster you’ll raise your self-esteem to the level of the super-successful! Come out of the shadows. It’s your time to shine!